Who We Used to Be
by aBraveNewShip
Summary: It's been a year since Emma left Storybrooke. She's been calling Regina for a while now, but the Queen never answers the Savior. What happens when they finally decide to meet and go over everything? SwanQueen based off of Adele's "Hello"


**A/N -** It's a little after midnight and I have to get up around 7:30 for class. Oops. But I just couldn't stop thinking about this. I, like pretty much 99% of the world, have been _obsessed_ with Adele's new song "Hello." I'm guessing folks have already made videos to that song, and probably other fanfics. I don't really want to add to a whole influx of similar stories, I just really wanted to try writing an SQ one-shot to that song. So, here it is. I hope you all enjoy it! Reviews are much appreciated!

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"Hey, it's me. I know it's been a while, but… I- I was just wondering if- if maybe you'd wanna meet?" Emma Swan sighed loudly as she pressed her cellphone firmly against her ear. Leaning against her aging yellow Bug, the former sheriff of Storybrooke had parked in a rather odd location. Thick fog danced through the tall and mighty pine trees of the forest she used to explore. It had been a cold morning in mid-October, but Emma didn't mind. She welcomed the cool breeze that blew past as she drove with her window open, her hair blowing in the wind. She knew the route like the back of her hand; it'd been just over a year since she'd passed through the small town, and yet, it felt like only yesterday that she'd left. The orange line was invisible, but Emma knew it was there. It had to be. "Regina, please pick up." Crossing one leg over the other, the blonde gazed out at the empty road and remembered her first night there. Flashes of a gray wolf sauntering in front of the path flickered in her memory; a green street sign that read "Leaving Storybrooke" reflected the headlights of her vehicle. "Look, I'm here, ok. I'm back. I just… I just wanna talk. I'm—"

Emma let out a violent shiver as the atmosphere shifted. And suddenly, she wasn't alone anymore. Her entire body shaking, Emma took two steps forward and passed over the magic line that had been drawn to protect the town. A swift swirl of purple smoke gradually dissolved and the one person she missed most in the world appeared, just as regal as she had always been.

Her hair a bit longer and her cheeks a bit more sunken in, Regina Mills stood stiffly with her hands in the pockets of her black trench-coat. Her legs were crossed at her ankles, her knee-high velvet boots zipped up all the way. Her lips were painted a gentle rose and her gray shirt had been impeccably ironed. Slowly, and against her better judgement, the Queen peered over at Emma.

Regina tried not to react. She tried so hard to hide how weak her knees had become and how shallow her breathing now was. She tried to act as if she hadn't missed seeing that red, leather jacket every morning. She tried to mask how relieved she was to see Emma, and how angry she was at the Savior. Regina tried not to react.

"What are you doing here?" Speechless at the very sight of Regina, Emma's mouth hung open like a fool. She stared at the mayor, surprised that she actually came. "I asked you a question Ms. Swan," the brunette quipped.

Shaking her head as if she were trying to shed a bad dream, Emma blinked rapidly and racked her brain for something to say— anything. She'd been trying for so long, hoping for months. She had an entire speech prepared for this very moment, but she lost it. "I've tried calling," she murmured. "At least a thousand times. But… you're never home."

Standing tall and broad-shouldered, her spine pencil-straight, Regina cleared her throat in a prim manner and brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. She'd wondered if this day would ever come. And if it did, there was so much she wanted to say— so much she wanted to know. But, now that it was finally here, the scars that Emma had left reopened and all Regina could think about was how miserable she'd been. Just then, something glinted and caught Emma's attention. It was a silver band. On Regina's ring finger. Emma didn't recognize it. And suddenly, she felt as if the wind had been knocked out of her.

Regina saw what Emma was gawking at and stuffed her hand back into her pocket. "What are you doing here?" she echoed. "What do you want?"

Emma moved as though she were about to step in Regina's direction, but stopped when she noticed the most powerful woman she'd ever met cringe away. Frowning, Emma swallowed loudly and pushed through the fire that burned through her chest. "I wanted to see you," she confessed. "I wanted to- I _needed_ to tell you how sor—"

"Don't," Regina warned.

"Regina, please, I—"

"I said don't." A dark scoff escaped Regina's lips. "Are you serious? Unbelievable. How dare you?" She glared at Emma menacingly in the hopes that Emma would cower beneath her gaze. "You don't get to do that. You don't get to show up after 13 months and try to get rid of your guilt. Not like this." When Emma didn't say anything, when she didn't even attempt to defend herself, Regina minimized the space between them until she was just three feet away from Henry's other mother. "Do you know what a year does to a person?"

The closer Regina got, the louder Emma's heart pounded in her ears. Something inside of her begged her to turn around and run, to go back to her apartment in New York and act like this never happened. For a second, she yearned for another curse to wash away her memories. She wanted to believe in happy endings; she wanted to believe they were real. The more she thought about it, though, the more she realized she'd ruined the only chance she may ever get at one.

"I'm sorry," Emma said, her voice trembling ever-so-slightly. "For everything. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I never meant to hurt you."

"But you did, Emma!" Regina countered in a moment of weakness, unable to control her burst of anger. "You left me. Do you understand that? _You_ left _me_!"

"You told me to go," the blonde reminded. "You said you never wanted to see me again. _You_ said—"

"And do you know _why_ I told you to go? Did it ever occur to you that there was a _reason_?" Regina searched Emma's unsure features. She noted the way Emma's chin dimpled as she furrowed her brow and tried to decipher what Regina was trying to say. "You hurt me, Emma. Not the Dark One, but _you_. You did the one thing you promised you never would: you gave up on me. You stopped seeing me as Regina, but as the Evil Queen. Ever after everything… even after we saved you."

D esperate to make sense of it all, Emma pleaded with Regina. "I know, and I'm sorry. If I could take it back, I would. You have to believe me. I didn't mean it. I was confused about everything and- and I didn't know what to do. I took it out on you and I shouldn't have. I thought- I thought I just needed some time to work through everything, to heal. But I couldn't."

A single tear rolled down Regina's cheek as she listened to the only person who could ever make the pain stop. "You still don't understand," she lamented. You broke my heart, Emma. _That's_ why I told you to go."

Regina shook her head hopelessly and turned away from Emma. She couldn't bear to look at her any longer. It hurt too much. Without saying goodbye or uttering another word, the Queen began walking away from the Savior, feeling even emptier than when she first arrived.

"Regina, wait!" Although her legs felt like jelly, Emma ran forward and tenderly reached out for Regina. She tugged on the brunette's arm and spun her around until they were face to face, nose to nose. And then, without any warning, Emma made the most daring decision of her entire life; she reached forward and pulled Regina towards her. They collided with a graceful force as their lips pressed against one another's.

As much as she wanted to give in to the comfort and security of Emma's embrace, Regina pushed her away. "I can't," she exhaled.

"What?"

"I can't," Regina said again, her hands shaking at her sides.

It was then that Emma spotted the ring once more. "Because of Robin?"

As if she'd been punched in the stomach, Regina let out a strained, "What?"

"You've moved on," Emma surmised.

Taken aback by such a bold assumption, Madame Mayor couldn't help but laugh. "Is that what you think this is?" she asked, displaying the plain piece of jewelry. When Emma nodded solemnly, Regina's disbelieving smile disappeared. Removing the band, she offered it to Emma. "Go ahead," she pressed.

"I don't get it."

"Of course you don't," Regina snarked.

Examining the small piece of metal, Emma grimaced in frustration. "What is this?"

"This," Regina began as she took back the ring, "is the one thing I hold most dear." It was a cryptic message to all but herself. As she put it back where it belonged, she continued. "You left your sword behind," she explained, almost timidly. "It was the only thing that…"

"That what?"

Regina stared down at the treasure she had forged on her own. "It was the only thing that proved you'd been here… that you weren't something I dreamt up." It slowly dawned on Emma what Regina meant and when she did, she was dumbstruck. That was the last thing she was expecting. She never though Regina would so something like that. "Go back to the other side, Emma," she heard Regina say. "Go back to your life in New York."

"I can't," Emma mumbled, having relocated the ability to form sentences. She recovered from her shock just enough to stand her ground. Reaching for Regina once again, she waited for the woman to resist, but it never happened. Emma held the brunette in her strong arms and looked her in the eyes. "I _was_ here," she assured. "It wasn't a dream. Can you give me another chance?" She rested her forehead against Regina's and for a moment, the two women were silent. They were together once more. But it wasn't the same.

Wanting nothing more than to believe Emma, to give into the blonde and start again, Regina just didn't have in in her. With a relenting sigh, she wriggled out of Emma's grasp, but immediately longed for the contact. "Please," she whispered.

Emma remained stoic. That single word cut into her like a knife. That tortured tone with which Regina spoke. But she knew what she had to do. "Ok," she conceded. Emma was terrified of making the same mistake twice, but this time was different. She couldn't explain it. "I'll go. If that's what you really want." The last image Emma would ever have of Regina was the back of her head. "I _am_ sorry, Regina. For everything— for breaking your heart. I never wanted to do that." Before she stepped over that line for the last time, Emma glanced over her shoulder and said, "If you ever… if you ever want to talk, you have my number. Call me, and I'll come running."

Emma took a deep breath and held it as she passed through the transparent border, and reentered a world without magic. She was no longer able to see Regina, but she could still feel her presence; Emma could still hear her heartbeat. She hadn't accomplished what she'd set out to do that morning, but at least she could say that she tried.

Regina, however, could still see Emma and they both knew it. For the second time, the Queen watched as the Savior left. It hurt just as much as it had 13 months ago. Actually, it hurt even more. The closer Emma got to getting into her car and driving away, the sharper the pangs in Regina's chest.

Fumbling for her keys, doing her damnedest to swallow her grief and not let it show, Emma curled her fingers around the door-handle when something in her pocket vibrated. Her cellphone lit up and the light flashed frantically. It was an unknown number.

"Hello?" she answered cautiously.

"Hey," a quiet voice greeted. "It's me. "

Falling against the side of her yellow Bug, Emma Swan finally exhaled. Tears of relief streamed down her cheeks as she tossed her phone into the automobile, sprinted across the boundary and lifted Regina Mills into her arms, hugging her as close as she could. And this time, neither of them had any intention of ever letting go.


End file.
